Hi... Good evening. It's been a while I haven't posted my writing here. Been so busy and kinda lazy to write xD. I read my old posts just now and I was like 'Oh no..My writings were so bad' but I was brought to the past at the same time reading them :D Okay, so, tonight, I will write my reflection about my experience as a teacher since 2012.
I graduated from my college on September 2011. In the same year, I became a Liaison Officer (LO) in SEA Games at Palembang in November 2011. January 2014 was my first time becoming a teacher in my hometown, Sungai Lilin (well, it's not a village but not yet a city). I was accepted as a teacher at SMP Negeri 1 Sungai Lilin (the school where I studied when I was 12-14) and Madrasah Aliyah Ar-Risalah.
I'm gonna tell you why I ended up becoming a teacher. Well, indeed, my background education directed me to be a teacher (English education study program). As a young girl, however, my ego was still high. I didn't want to be a teacher as I thought being a teacher was not a cool and prestigious job. I wanted something more sophisticated like working as a banker or employer in a famous company. I, then, applied for a job as a CSO (customer service officer) in SUMSEL Bank. I was nearly accepted to work at this bank after going through three steps of tests. But, in the end, I didn't work at this bank as I did not come to the last test, the 4th test which was medical check-up. I did not come because I knew my parents would not give me permission to work at banks. They wanted me to be a teacher. I let it go and became a teacher.
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Until now, it's been almost three years I have been a teacher. I now realize that teaching has become my passion. Though people think becoming a teacher is not tempting and a high-class job, I love being a teacher. It's a very distinguished and honorable profession. Well, here are my experiences. At first, I was annoyed by students' doings. As time passed, however, I realized they were lovable. They loved me, too.
They could be my mood booster. Whenever I felt down and sad due to some problems, these damn feelings would fade away as I interacted and chatted with them in the class. Looking at their shining bright eyes when I was teaching them, I felt miracle. Their eyes and smiles strengthened and aroused my positive energy. Moreover, I felt a high level of satisfaction when they nodded their head showing they had understood what I was teaching to them. What made me even love this profession more was that I got a new family. They would smile and greet me either when I walked around them in the school or when we met accidentally somewhere. It's not that I was glad because I was honored. I was simply pleased when people noticed my existence in this world :) Well, I was even happier when they contacted me through Facebook or text me asking why I was absent from the class, not teaching them; even happier when they text me and said they missed me; even happier when they trusted me to share their problems; and even happier when they came to my home to see me me when I was sick.
Alright, now I'll share about my experience with my students. You know that I teach in Sungai Lilin. Students in this place was quite different from the city. It's so difficult to teach students here. I'm not saying they are all stupid. Just....Most of them are not motivated to study. They come to school just because they are forced to, not because they want to. Perhaps, it's only 50 students out of more than 230 students who really come to school to study seriously. Besides, they have different backgrounds in terms of economic status, family, and home environment.
What I learn is that I may not judge and underestimate students too fast like oh he is stupid, he is naughty, or he wont be successful. Once, I taught in a class in which some naughty boys were sitting in a group in the back row. During the class, they chatted, they didn't pay attention, they were so lazy to do assignments even to think. I asked them to behave properly in the class. I also asked them to sit in the front row. However, it changed nothing. I was then irritated. I called them to talk to me. As I asked them some questions, one said,"I dont have money to buy book, Miss"; another said,"I live with my grandma, Miss. I was left by my father and my mom as they divorced". I was so touched knowing their answers. I then figured out why they behaved so in the class.
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Another story is that I was annoyed when there were 1 boy student and 1 girl student who were often absent. When I asked other students about the boy student,"where is he? Why is he often absent?". One of my students replied,"Miss, he often goes to Palembang to buy vegetables as he helps his parents to sell vegetables". Hearing this answer, my annoyance was gone. Another story, but still in the same class, a girl student i mentioned before was often absent as well. On the day she was in the class, I asked her why she was often absent and she said,"I was overslept, Miss". "Why so?" I asked. "My father did not wake me up,"she replied. "Where is your mom?" I inquired again. "She have passed away, Miss," said my student.
In different class, I asked one boy to take books from the office to the class. But he refused. "Please, ask other student, Miss" said the boy.
"Why do you ask me to ask your friend to take the book?" I asked.
"I'm having stomachache."
"Why?"
"I haven't eaten, Miss."
"Why didnt you eat during the break session?"
"No, Miss."
"Why?" I pushed him to tell the truth.
"I don't have money, Miss"
"How much money do you get from your parents for school?"
"Rp.3000 thousands, Miss. I spend Rp.1000 for the fare of public transportation to go too school and another Rp.1000 to go home"
"Where do you live?"
"Sukamaju, Miss (Sukamaju is quite far from our school). My house is not right on the road side, but I have to walk through an alleyway. I have to walk about 2 km more to get to my home" (Sukamaju is already very far from the school but he has to walk another 2 km. What? Like, seriously? This smart and diligent boy had such a hard life? Well, My throat was getting hurt because I hold my tears back)
"What is your father?" I still asked him
"He is a fish trader who sell the fish by using bicycle. My mom is just a housewife."
Hearing all his answers, I was so damn touched. My tears were about to fall down but I managed to hold it back as I was in front of students, it would be embarrassing if I cried in front of them . Then I walked to the office and asked the poor boy student to follow me. I gave him Rp.10.000 to buy food and he refused at first. But, I said I would be so angry if he didn't accept it. So, he accepted the money at last and say thanks to me.
From my teaching experience, I learn how support and care from teachers really matter for students. Once, I had unmotivated lazy boy student. But I often gave him compliment whenever he tried to do the assignment although he was so darn lazy. Since then, he changed. He became enthusiastic and diligent in the class and was so friendly with me. I really witnessed that support, love, care, and sincerity that I gave to my students had waken them up and burnt their motivation to learn. My conclusion is that don't expect students to understand teachers. Instead, teachers are the ones who MUST understand their students, dive in their real life and guide them to see and dig the 'gold' inside them. Harsh words like "you are stupid" or "you are useless" will only 'kill' them. The greatest teacher is not the one who can educate with violence or harsh words but he/she is the one who can educate through kindness, sincerity, love, care, and patience. Well, I'm not implying that I am already a good teacher, but at least I'll try my best to be a good one. :)
Sabtu, 14 Juni 2014